Heavy Gaze — 22 January 2020 on Rocket Shop Radio Hour

Heavy Gaze joined guest hosts Mollie Allen and Genevieve Rossi on ‘Rocket Shop‘, Big Heavy World’s weekly local Vermont music radio hour on 105.9FM The Radiator. Catch up with him at facebook.com/HeavyGaze.

On Wednesday, January 22nd, Heavy Gaze delivered a zealous performance at Big Heavy World’s Rocketshop. Heavy Gaze is solo project created by performer Nathan Meunier as an outlet to let his inner emotions relentlessly flow. Nathan describes his sound in Heavy Gaze as “indie gloom rock/depression rock/loud stuff,'' a description that he later made very clear through his piercing guitar and cutting lyrics. With the name alone, Heavy Gaze was able to elicit undivided attention towards the self-described indie gloom that awaited out ears.

Heavy Gaze opened with his original “Haunts Me Still”. From the first thirty seconds alone, Nathan was able to convince the listeners that if our repressed feelings had a sound, this would be it. The song immediately transfixed us into a daze.

As the song picks up pace, we were met with quiet lyrics and louder drums. Despite revealing that the drums are actually his primary instrument, he enjoys playing the guitar for this project so he can properly capture the sound he’s looking for. Nathan’s experience as a musician extends back to middle school, where he first picked up these instruments.

As Nathan opened up about his music, it was obvious to tell that this period was critical to his tone and taste. He tells the story of an adolescence impacted by weird sounds and 242 Main performance space. Nathan first remembers walking by 242 Main from buying groceries with his mom and hearing the jarring sounds of heavy metal from the small performance area inside. Once he was old enough, he sought the sound of 242’s loud and rebellious bands.

“Back then, it was different” Nathan recalls his inspirations. “I was into metal and grime-punk. It’s what I was about. I absorbed it, I drank it.” Yet, the past is very much a source for the present in Nathan’s case with this personal project. The reason for the music, though mainly attributed as a form of catharsis for his depression and social anxiety, inspiration, as he reflects, comes from a re-exploration of his past; he finds the sound of Heavy Gaze taken ahold by the ridiculous sounding guitar from long ago grunge or by his penchant for peculiar performance. And for the first time in the evening, as the impassioned Nathan spoke fondly of his creative influences, we experienced the performer separate from the guise of his gloomy project. Despite representing something so dark, it was evident that this subgenre of music brought a certain light to Nathan’s eyes.

Heavy Gaze’s second performance showed the debut of an untitled piece, which was catchier and more energetic than the first song. But the tonal desperation didn’t hesitate to engulf listeners, as the all-consuming guitar eventually began. It seemed to have an omnipresent sensation of intensity akin to this sort of heavy and hard-hitting subgenre hybrid.

When asked about music in Burlington, the solo-performer of Heavy Gaze has much to say. Previously, Nathan had lived in Burlington in the past, but then moved to Bennington. In Bennington, he found himself derelict of his type of music, or, even much music at all. “It was very limiting.” he says about the music scene in Bennington.

But, as comes with all great creators, Nathan improvised. In order to fulfill the need for a creative community, Nathan would host potlucks comprised of the subgenres groups in his apartment complex. This creative solution was a way to “forcibly” conjure an expressive art scene where one previously wasn’t.

Being back in Burlington, he comments, is a relief. There’s enough smallness in the amount of groups in Btown that offers “a bit of connectivity” between different bands. “It allows us to pick and choose.” he says, adding that it’s a “privilege” to be able to have such a small selection, and yet have it be enough.

The third song that Heavy Gaze performed was “In Our Eyes”, which began with a set of fortified instrumentals via the programed drum machine and electric guitar. Together, these two forces produced a punky effect, reflecting back to us Nathan’s original inspirations. With lyrics like “Tired of trying to make it work / Plant our bodies in the dirt / And grow into something else / Better than we were ourselves” it is safe to say that they are unsettling at the very least. The lyrical diction points us back towards the primary reason of this project; as Nathan puts it, he uses the creations in Heavy Gaze as a “a repository to store all the dark things in my brain”. As the song progresses, I can’t help but feel a sense of colliding forces-the universal language of angst that’s found in punk music. As the song comes to a close, I’m left with darkened astonishment that can only come from an agony as deep as Heavy Gaze’s.

If you’d like to see more of Nathan Meunier of Heavy Gaze, you can find the project online on social media and Bandcamp. Also, keep an eye out for Heavy Gaze at Orlando’s bar and lounge, as this is an occasional stomping ground for the indie musician.

Text by Jay Strek

Photo by James Lockridge.