Women In Vermont Rock

Women in Vermont Rock

by George Sand

Come along with me on a journey, into my house. We are all in the living room, sitting around, sipping tea, drinking coffee.Gathered in the room are some friends of mine. Pamela Polston, who was the lead vocalist in the Decentz, is over here, on the couch. Beside her is Steph Pappas, who continues to do solo acoustic music, and once played with Miss Bliss, Witch, and others. She is having tea. Suzanne Schmidt, on the lazyboy, was the drummer for Virginia and the Wolves, and played now with a new, yet unnamed band. She also does acoustic solo work, though not much right now. She is also having tea. Diane Horstmeyer is sitting on the floor, with a cup of coffee in her hand. She wrote much of the music for Miss Bliss (and later Augusta Furnace,) and does solo work with spoken word and electric guitar. Peg Tassey Ayer is on the recliner with her daughter, Audrey Sunshine, on her la[. She was the force behind Peg Tassey and Proud of it, and now collaborated with her husband Trevor in the Velvet Ovum Band. Peg has done solo work throughout her career. There is an air of nostalgia and excitement in the room. And from me, admiration, because I play in a rock band like many of these women have done before me.

I must warn you, however, that none of this journey really happened as I have described it. What did occur, did so at different times, in different places, so everything that follows is completely out of context. The conversation isn’t real, and this certainly isn’t journalism. All forthcoming statements were made by these quoted, and I, your humble reporter, have made all attempts to remain true to the sentiments of the speakers. I am here, on the floor, next to Diane, also drinking coffee, with a good view of the small crowd around me. This is part of an ongoing dialogue about rock and roll; specifically in Vermont, and specifically as it has changed and been changed by women. Other women will be represented as time goes on, and please, chime in if you think you have something to say.

GEORGE: When did you start playing music?

PEG: I started playing in eighth grade, when I got a guitar with green stamps. That’s when I started to play, because I always wrote poetry, even when I was a little kid…then I started to want to sing with it… so that was eighth grade, and I was in my first band in tenth grade. That band started off doing over songs…this is when Aerosmith was the underground, and that kind of mentally sound was very rebellious…we were dressing really wild, I had an afro out to my shoulders. 

SUE: I come from a really long line of musical people in my family, so I started playing at four or five - piano, cello. Around fourth grade, I made a deal with my parents that I would continue to play that other stuff if they would let me pick something that I wanted to play, and they fell for that. So, I picked drums. Probably the end of high school, I started playing in bands. I moved up here in 1985, did some solo acoustic stuff, finished some stuff I was doing in New Hampshire…got into a band, probably around 1989. 

PAMELA: I played the sousaphone in high school, and sanf a lot. Then it kind of went on vacation for a number of years…then for me it was the Decentz from June 1981, and I left it in December of ‘83.

GEORGE: So, what was it like to play rock and roll, as a young woman? What is it like now that you have some experience?

DIANE: I started writing when I was in high school - self-indulgent, teenage girl-angst kind of songs - I was playing acoustic guitar at open mikes in New York City…this is the mid 1970’s..the people I was hanging out with were folkies like David Peale an other, but I got to see all these bands like the Criminals, Descendents and Invisible Guest…I got on the guest list because I worked at a record/head shop called Bleecker Bob’s, where members of bands would hang out. I was playing on the street. Women were pretty much dismissed as not being hard core enough, not being able to experience rock and roll, or be a lead singer. Back then in the seventies, and I think that attitude has prevailed until just recently, especially in your metal or country rock bands, you can’t have a woman lead singer and still be a solid rocking band. 

STEPH: Women can do country. They got all dolled up, but you never see them wailing on the guitar…

DIANE: There is a certain look about them, which I could never afford…I was easily assimilated into any scene, because I wasn’t a “star” like them. They [male musicians] never knew me as a songwriter, except a few times I would pick up a guitar, and people would always say afterward, “hey, I like that son,” but they would never think to invite me to jam or anything. 

GEORGE: Palema, you were the only woman in your band.

PAMELA: Yes. Three of us did the singing. Jimmy (Ryan) and Brett (Hughes) sang…whoever wrote the song usually sang it…I guess I was sort of the front person, being the only female, and physically free enough to jump around a lot,,,which I did. These days. There are more women playing instruments and not necessarily the ‘girl-singer’ thing, which is definitely what our band was like, and that was a little more stereotypical. But even so, for then and for here, it was unusual…ground breaking. I know I wasn’t the first, but as far as I know, we were one of the first all-original, and with bands like Pinhead and later Miss Bliss and others charted the acceptability of original music around here. And I was this wild-woman on stage..In real life, I’m not really like that. Everybody knew who I was… people would come up to me on the street, and it was…king of weird. In some ways I liked it; it made me feel good about myself, but I have to admit that I came to..not resent it exactly, but just feel like it was really shallow; that no one really knew who I was as a person. And I also came to realize that a lot of people thought I was a total bimbo. I’m sure there was more than one person who was very surprised when I started writing and they found out that I was actually intelligent.

GEORGE: I wonder sometimes when I’m playing, because I have no stage presence…and some of it is that I’m shy, but maybe some of it is that I’m afraid of being seen as some sort of flighty…you can be pigeon-holed.

PAMELA: You become public property in a sense. I got a tiny, small-town taste of what real fame is like, and it gave me a lot of insights. It decreased the glamour aspect of people on stage for me…I began to see [musicians] as people, doing their job…

GEORGE: Something you can’t appreciate unless you've been on stage.

SUE: There was a time when people would come [to shows] and say, “look, there’s a girl drummer!” and that was all they saw. Or people would say, “Oh, you’re pretty good for a girl,” and whatever they thought about my drumming; they didn’t even see that…so I think that’s different. We are not as much of a spectacle…for guys that are good musicians, it’s never made a difference, I’ve found…If you can play, okay. But when the world looks at you, it makes a difference, because they don’t know as much about music…then you’re a girl as opposed to a drummer. 

STEPH: [I remember] what it was like to be in Bliss and play QE2 in Albany, and the other guys playing would be on the stage, drinking beers…Maybe that’s it, maybe it’s the alcohol/bar scene..

GEORGE: What sort of attitude did they have toward Miss Bliss?

STEPH: They would just look at you like, “Oh, a bunch of dumb girls…” when you first show up. And then after you play, it’s like, they want to take you home…

PEG: For me, it’s changed, in that my heart was completely open when I first started. I felt like the world was just this beautiful set of open arms just welcoming me… I didn't feel any sexism at that time. Although I did before in my first band, and when I played with Ethan and Max of the Hollywood Indians. That’s when I wrote “Boy’s Club.” We were never in a band together; they came to record with me. I was always not taken seriously as a musician. When I joined Peg Tassey and Proud of It, those guys were quite a bit younger than me, and they were very technical as musicians; really talented at their instruments. They respected me on my instrument, They really did. Nobody ever once didn’t show up for a rehearsal…no one ever showed up drunk for a show. And that was a real phenomenon. But the fact was that I was definitely leading the band, and that caused trouble. They would kind of act like I was their mother and they would be rebellious and naughty. They’d think I was correcting them, which I wasn’t-I was just trying to talk to them about music, and stuff like that. It was the whole mother-kid thing, you know?

GEORGE: It’s funny how you get thrown into that role.

PEG: Yeah, just because I was a woman…we all agreed that the dynamics were different. But at the time, I felt like the world was so welcoming. I just wanted to kiss the audience after [a show]. I remember that feeling. Towards the end, I learned that being a woman in a position of perceived power - I didn’t think of it as power - but other people saw it as power because I would book $1200.00 gigs. We got paid a lot, because I was - and still am - good at booking, and we had a great band…and that was a perception of power to some people…to me it sucked the joy out of me, having to deal with that shit. That was when I felt like, had there been more women around at the time I don’t think it would have happened the same way - more women around doing music. Me and Lene (Clare, Do It Now Foundation) and Mary (Fifield, Picture on the Ceiling and Daydream Guerilla) were the only women that were doing anything that was even slightly loud, as far as I know.  

GEORGE: What about Miss Bliss? 

PEG: That was before. They were in that same fun circle with the Hollywood Indians. They weren’t around. They had moved to Boston.

STEPH: It seems to be a little easier. But the shit is still there, behind the fan. It’s just being held on a rien a little bit better. 

DIANE: I don’t think it’s so much “the shit” being there.

STEPH: It’s gonna start coming back worse if our younger sisters don’t keep up with the stuff we have already gone through, to keep them from going backwards…

DIANE: Yeah, there seems to be a healthy mix of younger women and guys going to shows.

GEORGE: More than there was?

DIANE: No, I think that’s what you needed; I think in order to have a healthy scene, you need to have a healthy mix in your population of fans and performers. 

The conversation flows, with people coming in and out of the room, adding their own thoughts and experiences. In upcoming episodes, we’ll talk about how much support women really give each other, and how the music scene in Burlington has changed in the past ten years. Diane and Peg describe what it’s like to become a mom and hang onto a rocking sensibility. I haven’t even gotten a chance to tell you who our influences are, what motivates us. We’ll talk about all the stuff that affects us here, in this business of music. Through my journey, I have learned that these issues are important, not just to me, but to so many women who play this game. How am I perceived? How are the dynamics of gender relevant to music? The idea is not to draw unnecessary attention to ourselves. It will be a fine day when articles such as this are not written, because ‘women in music; will not be news. Burlington has come a long way in this regard, but as Steph Pappas says, our sisters have to keep up the work and the talk for it to continue. So let’s work, and talk, and continue.